Existential Pining

As I scroll through Instagram and look at photos of people I no longer see or particularly care about, I become a tad bit existential. What does this all mean? I want to meet more people, get more involved in there lives, get more aquainted with all the whole world with it’s many colors, accents, and faces.

I want to travel.

I want to pack up my car and my boyfriend and my little life and leave.


That is not what I am to do.

I am to live the American life right now. I can begin making connections slowly, and leave eventually.

For now I am called to stay.

And that existentially, experientially, sucks.

But I must believe it is better.


In Threes

There are times when my chest and lungs and heart are so full of love and longing and song lyrics that it feels hard to breathe or function or live.

It is in these precious moments that I most need a hug, a kiss, or a cuddle session.

Long distance is my current enemy, at the top of my hit list, my cosmic opposite.

I am in love with you.

Come home.